Motivation

My Motivation at the moment isn't that focused on school right now. Since the middle of the semester is here and projects and tests are coming up, I should focus on passing my classes and doing well. I have been swayed from my focus because of the free time that I have. I love video games and I’m consumed with the fact that I’m very good at them. I still go to the gym and try and keep fit. I intend to get my motivation up by my friends support, and talking to my dad. When I get unmotivated its not like I don’t do any work, its just when I do the work I’m not interested in it and my mind is on other things. Due to the fact that I am not the most comfortable when I am reading, when I sit and read a book I often get fidgety and lose focus quickly. One way that I can help myself get motivation is to set a task like doing well in school, or getting my project done. Then to reward myself I will go and do arena on World of Warcraft and play call of duty. I also like to reward myself with getting food; I love inn-n-out and often go there when I do well on a paper or test. When I’m feeling overwhelmed I go and play basketball with my friends and go swimming. Then when I come back I feel relaxed and ready to work, I often do my schoolwork with my best friend as well. We keep each other motivated.

World war 2 story

`When my grandfather first told me that he served in World War 2, I was very young, and didn’t know what to think. Now that I am older I understand what he was telling me about, and how he flew P51 mustang in the fight against Hitler in Germany. He told me about stories how when he had an enemy Messerschmitt, a German air plane with high firepower, but known for being slow. The US air force was taught if they were to have a Messerschmitt on their tail, they would fly into the sun, because The P51 mustang’s engine was the fastest and most powerful at the time. He told me that one time when he was low on gas, he was forced to drop his entire arsenal of bombs because it weighed too much. He said for fun, he would drop his bombs on the cows of France, in the pastures. My grandfather was a first lieutenant in the united states air force, his story not only changed how I felt about war, but gave me an insight at an early age on how messed up war can be. He was often in dogfights with enemy pilots; he explained that he and his co-pilot would have to use their lock on missiles to defeat the planes. This story gave me a new respect for what he did, as well as a awe as to how weird and unpredictable war could be.

The Things I Left

            I carry the shame of leaving everything I knew for 16 years to start a new life. I wanted fresh start, a new city, with no friends, no goals. I carry the guilt of failing my dad’s expectations in school. I carry the disappointment of playing basketball for 15 years and then sitting on the bench even though I had the skills to play. I carry 3 items on me; my wallet, cell phone, and car keys. More important then the tangible things are the intangible things, my past, my goals, and my thoughts of what to do next. As I reflect on past events I can only think of the type of kid I was. Suborn, annoying, immature, but still intelligent. These attributes shaped how I live today, as I grew older and looked back on the way I acted at my old school, I can only admit that I had some of the bullying and abuse coming. The constant teasing, my dad’s new girlfriend that despised me, my old traditions that my father and I held, all of this was shattered. For 15 years my father and I lived together, did everything…ate, played sports, slept, we were each others support. When my dad wanted a women in his life, my childhood brain thought, “Why not mom?” For the next 7 years I would try my absolute hardest to get this woman out of my house. The outright defiance I had for authority and everything that it represented effected me in school, and in my social life.